Just what am I to you?

Well. I feel kind of sad/miserable.

My results are kinda okay. Well, I am pissed about geog and chemistry (and a bit about amaths) but at least I didn't fail any exams? Except social studies. That was really horrible but I still managed to pass overall yay. Now I'm hoping my lit results for this exam is enough to pull up my lit score for the whole year and that my results for CA were enough to pull up my geog marks. Sigh.

Anyway, that's not the point of this post.

I am seriously wondering. What am I to you?

I've tried to ask my friends but they would usually try to avoid my question T_T I need to know whether I am selfish, egoistic person or what? I would like to change if I can help it (like, if I am really bad that people just cannot stand me). I try to access myself based on people's attitude to me but I really don't know.

Really. What am I to you?

My warped personality?

Hey guyss :) Well, nowadays I was thinking that my personality seems really really horrible D: Like, I am a cruel person and I know it sigh.. I see characters in books that are so kind that I'm wondering how it is possible to be like them. And I was wondering why I can't seem to be kind when my friends can be. And today my friend, Risako, told me maybe its because I am a sadist person. TA-DAH! The word I was struggling to describe my personality is this one! She's so smart.

Yes. I am probably a sadist person. And no, I am not a masochist. Are you kidding me. So yeah, I am glad I found the right word for my personality. I think its quite true. And sadly. I should punch myself a few million times.

And I'm a lobster.

She is a lamb. Well, today we did some personality test and there's a lion, lamb and lobster personality. Lobster is a rational creature (really?) and lion is the slightly aggressive creature. Lamb is the more submissive type.

Yay. I got myself a lobster. What is life. Hahahaha

DREAM HIGH

Oh god I watched Dream High and its really really good! Extremely inspiring and I totally love it!!

Here are videos behind the scenes haha oh god I LOVE IT TO THE MAX :D

This casts are real good! I recommend you watch it :) I don't regret watching it hahaha 

Letter to my 10 years old self

HI so I see that there is a trend of people writing to their own 10-year self. Seems interesting so I shall write it here:

Dear 10 years old self,

Don't get so complacent when you do well in your exams! Also, you have to enjoy your life at school cause it's the easiest part of life. Don't hurry to grow up cause, well, you have 8 years to be a teenager till you become an adult. And you will be an adult for the rest of your life. Makes sense huh..

Open up more or you will become a nerd (like what I read in books) and its not cool. If not, you won't have much life in primary school. Honestly, primary school is the best time to actually study hard and play hard. Don't hole yourself in the library all the time (you should hang out with your friends!) Don't think of trying to get into a super good school or you will get disappointed. Nevertheless, come to the school I am in now and you will see that its a really good place since you get to meet so many friends. Don't trust people so easily (argh, a habit I still have right now) or you might... get stabbed in the heart. Hurry up and realise that whoever you meet isn't a friend right away and don't get too sensitive or you might bawl every single day.

Treasure your life to the maximum and care for your loved ones because one day, (like right now) the person will not be around. Its really sad. Don't take them for granted! Well, you will find out what I mean in the future but yes, this is really important.

Be yourself. If people hate you for not being yourself, who gives a damn.

Man, I have lots of "don't" whoah. My life must have been really bad when I was young. Forever alone. Hahaha I think that's about it for now.

Love,
your 15-years old self

TOTAL GOD OF DESTRUCTION

Just lamenting. I destroy everything. God knows why. Happiness, friendship, etc.

Oh yeah, I should totally call myself Lady of Destruction.

Sigh, today was miserable. I totally deserved to be hated I suppose. ):

Hope it gets better tmr!